Those who complain that British politicians lack principles should look to Northern Ireland. There is surely no other part of the UK where so many political leaders have such stupid, boring and ultimately harmful principles. Take Edwin Poots, Northern Ireland’s Health Minister, who has spent £37,000 of taxpayer money on his legal efforts to ban gay men from donating blood and £57,000 trying to prevent civil partners from adopting, citing homosexuality as “an illness”. This is the Health Minister.

I spent the Christmas holidays at home in Belfast where I was surrounded by reminders of some of the province’s peculiarly pointless principles. Just at the end of my street, 3 men kept a weekly vigil draped in red, white, blue and drizzle, huddled in the middle of the road. A year ago there were enough of them to block that road but now they watch haplessly as cars pass them by. They are “flaggers”; Loyalists determined not to stop protesting until the Union Flag flies above Belfast City Hall 365 days of the year, as it did until December 2012 when the council voted to fly it only on royal occasions. This movement to a more inclusive, shared public space has been labelled “cultural genocide” by many of these flaggers.

If only our politicians would pay these lonely warriors as little attention as the passing motorists do. Depressingly, these flag flying fanatics have been holding Unionist politicians to ransom, preventing any hint at agreement with Nationalists. The past few months in Northern Ireland encompassed talks between the 5 main parties, facilitated by American diplomat Richard Haass. The purpose of the talks was to tackle the issues of flags, parades and the past. “Flags” means not just the Union Flag on Belfast City Hall but the flags that appear on street lights across the country as crude markers of tribal territory. “Parades” meant the Loyalist Orange parades that take place every July and are banned from marching through many Catholic areas. “The past” meant addressing the civil war the country has just left behind, including the issue of more than 1,500 unsolved murders from the time. Both the Democratic Unionist and Ulster Unionist parties refused to accept the proposals put forward by Haass, which were accepted by the Nationalist parties. Put simply, the proposals would have meant accepting that a shared Northern Ireland means not enforcing one identity over any other.

What is remarkable about the talks was the willingness of Nationalists to accept compromise. In proposing that Belfast Council fly the Union Flag only on royal occasions, Sinn Fein, once the political wing of the IRA, was accepting that the British flag would be flown on land they consider Irish. Rather than take this as an important victory, Unionists saw no such thing, digging in their heels and clutching blindly to their flag. It’s often said that the Nationalists are too clever to admit they’ve lost while the Unionists are too stupid to realise they’ve won. The unnecessary flag controversy is a case in point.

Perhaps it’s foolish to expect a politics based historically on identity and fear of difference to be rational or reasonable. Politic-as-identity goes someway to explain our present madness: Northern Irish Unionism is undergoing an identity crisis. Many Unionists find themselves left behind by a United Kingdom that increasingly values diversity and individual rights. The stance of mainstream Unionism on LGBT rights would see them shunned even by UKIP and their insistent opposition to legal abortion is more in tune with pro-life Dublin than pro-choice London. While Unionism is loyal to the Crown, this loyalty comes not via England but Scotland, where much of Northern Irish Protestantism originates. To be Ulster- Scot is to be British and yet Scotland is this year to vote on leaving the Union altogether.

The response so far has been to revert to the old battle cry of “no surrender” and paint more things red, white and blue. This is hardly sustainable. A mature Unionism that is relaxed in its own skin is desperately needed but none is offered by the parties in power. Northern Irish Nationalists have successfully demilitarised their identity; now it’s the other side’s turn.