So, since this is the last issue before the Spring break, and as people customarily tend to travel during breaks, this article is going to be about taking advantage of opportunities to have sex in unusual locations. Of course, I’m not referring to France (their love of cheese is not unusual – just deal with it) or other travel destinations, but I’m trying to make a tenuous link with fucking in weird places. So, take a break from revision and prepare to be entertained.

Let’s start with the basics: Agoraphilia. The term refers to a wide range of practices or fantasies which involve sex outdoors, sex in wide-open spaces and sex in public places. The motivations for this can be as simple as wanting to try something novel, but sometimes involve much more complex desires. One of the main spheres of motivation for agoraphilia seems to be based around the openness of the space. Being able to see sky or distances larger than a standard bedroom can certainly give a sense of liberation and excitement. But breaking the standard rules of where you can and can’t have sex also feeds into that standard sexual mentality of losing inhibitions. If you grew up in the countryside, you’ve probably had an outdoor encounter at a drunken camp-out. But if you’re more of a town mouse, why not have a trip out of London, find a quiet forest and give it a go?

Alternatively, you could take it one step further and have a go at dogging. Most of you are probably familiar with the lingo, but ‘dogging’ is a British colloquial term given to the practice of having sex in public, usually a car-park or field, while others watch. Some practitioners get off on having people see them fucking, some get off on seeing others fucking. The motivations behind this are somewhat different from just being into outdoor sex, although there is some crossover. The exhibitionists sometimes enjoy sex as an act of performance, or enjoy the feeling of letting go and going primal, without having to worry about observers. For others, there’s a humiliation aspect to the fetish, in being publicly dominated. Unfortunately for doggers, dogging is illegal, and sex in public can carry a hefty fine.

If you don’t fancy taking that risk but still want to have sex in public, some beaches are sex-friendly. It’s worth noting though, that most nudist beaches have a fairly strict no-sex policy. If you don’t mind being indoors, there is still a multitude of sex and swingers’ clubs around London. If you’re gay, you’re in luck. London is full of gay saunas where sex is allowed and encouraged. There are also a hell of a lot of gay sex and kink clubs around, just a mouse-click away. If you’re straight, public sex might be a bit more difficult to get, but there are still options. There are a fair few straight swingers clubs around London – a few of them quite kinky. A quick online search (try Fetlife or just plain ol’ Google) should yield some good testimonials. If you’re a girl, you’ll get into most of them for a discount, if not for free. If you’re a guy, you’ll be paying a fair bit more. #patriarchy

Though, such spaces can take away part of the appeal. For many, it’s really about the thrill of nearly getting caught. I’m sure most of you have heard stories of people having sex on campus (and there are, indeed, several decent spots). If you’ve ever heard these stories and asked yourself why people would want to fuck in a Blackett basement shower with the stink of a half-clogged drain filling their nostrils – well, let me explain.

We’ve established that potentially getting found out and the accompanying feeling of naughtiness are major drivers. That’s why some of you will go for slightly cleaner spaces, such as various lecture theatres, Queen’s Tower or the library (you know who you are). But still, grime can be part of the thrill, which is why, time and time again, some of you’ll go for the grossness which accompanies public showers, toilets and Metric. That very literal feeling of dirtiness adds a new layer of taboo breaking to the experience, on top of the getting-caught-with-your pants-down factor. Whilst it’s not for everyone, the sport has many followers. There is a lot of erotic media revolving around this type of public sex, and it has become such a cultural phenomenon there is even a law in the UK specifically prohibiting sex in public bathrooms. So if you’re going to try it, be very careful you don’t get caught.

Regardless of whether it’s the great outdoors, showing off in public, the risk of being disturbed or getting down in dirty places that floats your boat, embrace it. If you’re feeling confused or shocked by this article, or even if you’re plain-old bored, I hope you at least feel inquisitive enough to take advantage of the break and try something new. Just be careful, and remember to always check for cameras.