Duke Nukem Forever
The fifth of our 'games that never made it'
Yes, eventually I get to it. Of course, technically speaking this game has been picked up to be carried to completion by Gearbox Studios, mainly by being incredibly famous for just never showing up.
Some of the keener nerds amongst you (I say this as a proud member of the clan) may have seen the graph which demonstrates that in the same time period this game was in development both world wars were fought (with enough time left over for a third if we felt like it), the President of the USA changed twice and most of the people who played the previous version moved out of their basements.
However Duke Nukem Forever will always be a game synonymous with vapourware because it took – feel free to not forgive the pun – forever. At this point the game has spent twice as long in development than all the super best games you love so much with more potentially undeserved hype surrounding it than a Peter Kay stand up DVD.
I for one could no longer care whether this game actually ever makes it in to fruition. It already got the people who tried to make it the first time sued – must the cycle of hurt this game inflicts never end?
Of course, despite all of this I’ll be celebrating my 62nd birthday waiting in line outside a Tesco, the only type of store that will exist in this hypothetical future, waiting for my copy. I’ll wave when I see you there.
