Give TfL a break

"Ah sorry I’m late, fucking Transport for London” – the familiar refrain uttered by thousands of Londoners every day. I mean it was obviously a failure of the bastards that you couldn’t make it to drinks/lectures/sessions of parliament on time. Right?

WRONG. I say we all take a look at ourselves. Was it really the bus that made you late, or was it something to do with the fact you were in pyjamas, stuffing yourself with so much Special K it lost any scarce ability it once had to keep your figure trim five minutes before you were supposed to leave?

Yes, TfL isn’t perfect. Sure, the buses sometimes stop their journeys half way through without explanation. And yes, the Circle and/or District line is guaranteed to be mysteriously closed every weekend (for the addition of new trains – I’m having none of it). But take a moment, think back to whatever dark hole Imperial did you the service of dragging you out of and try to recall the state of the public transport. If your experience was anything like mine, repressed memories of irregular services, long waits, suspiciously expensive tickets and the complete inability to travel between 11pm and 6:30am should horrifyingly resurface.

Not to mention that nights out at home usually entail more coercion, bargaining and bribery than the allocation of a World Cup as you attempt to negotiate a deal whereby you can get to and from the location and have somewhere to sleep. Since being in London, I’ve not thought once about how I’m going to get home – there’ll always be a night bus.

The Londoners amongst you are probably now itching to tell me of important defects I’ve missed, maybe the fact that the buses rarely arrive when scheduled. Whilst this is true, to those naysayers I can only suggest one thing: go somewhere that is not London, then catch a bus. Unless you’re luckier than a lottery winner who’s just eaten a good sandwich from Tesco, you’ll find that the buses rarely keep to schedule, and aren’t regular enough to compensate for this fact.

Next time you start blaming your tardiness on the transport system, stop. Reconsider what you’re about to say and just think. London is a huge city and yet the buses and tubes are regular, inexpensive and actually, dare I say it, fairly quick. So yes, TfL may have cheekily raised their prices by 5p over the New Year (nothing gets past me) and yes, at times they can be extremely frustrating. But come on guys, give TfL a break.