Two spies who love me

This Means War

Director McG Screenwriters Timothy Dowling, Simon Kinberg, Marcus Gautesen Cast Reese Witherspoon, Thomas Hardy, Chris Pine

With a love triangle that is as impossibly good looking as this one, it’s difficult to know which pair to root for. But to put things simply, it’s a showdown between a young James Bond (Hardy) and a young Ethan Hunt (Pine) who are also best friends. “I know that you would take a bullet for me, I would for you as well.” Awwwww. Their bromance is shown in none other than a loud, kinetic action scene on the rooftop of a tall Hong Kong tower, something director McG (Terminator: Salvation) should be familiar with. But it’s nothing special, with a modest scale that seems to be a waste on the two talented young actors. And just from watching the first ten to fifteen minutes or so of uninspired, highly ordinary footage, we immediately begin to worry whether the rest of the film will be as mediocre.

Things get more interesting however, for both the leading men and the audience, when Witherspoon enters the picture. As her bright and perky unlucky-in-love Lauren appears, it’s no more a nice bromance, but a full-on war, hence the title. A slight misunderstanding involving a blind date and a chance encounter at a video rental store, the two men meet her within minutes, and are completely taken by her. Witherspoon, the talented comic actress who can do this kind of simple role in her sleep, is effective in showing us just why these two tough guys are bending over backwards to impress her. The snarky, sly interception of various dates begins, with the two spies, who have access to plenty of CIA’s most advanced resources, smartly outdoing one another in the most spectacular ways. It’s a nonsense screwball comedy, worked to maximum effect with the occasional action added.

A part of what makes this such a watchable experience is the entirely convincing chemistry Hardy shares with Pine. They’re cheeky, funny, and seem uninhibited as they appear scene after scene bickering like two immature little boys. As they spy on Lauren she has no problem sharing all the intimate details of her two relationships to her blunt gal-pal confidant Trish (Chelsea Handler). FDR (Pine) has small and delicate hands – and this has more troubling implications, and Tuck (Hardy) is British – which apparently means the same thing. Hilarity ensues as the two spies are powerless to stop her.

It’s not all about the bromance however: because Witherspoon is paired with a priceless comedic supporting comedienne Handler. Her dialogue is rich with dry, sarcastic and sexually charged zingers, and with her deadpan delivery of the well-written lines, she is an invaluable addition to the already impressive cast. This allows Witherspoon room to develop her character more and although Handler’s role may be plagued with predictable clichés of a borderline alcoholic, sex-obsessed, middle-aged woman, the fact that she adds a whole lot more quality laughter into the film works out as a massive plus.

Despite the obvious humour that drives a lot of the film’s first half, the script also remains faithful to the more romantic side of the two sets of relationships. FDR, the womanising, club-hopping playboy who lived on one-night stands, is actually thinking of settling down with the girl who he is truly taken aback by. Tuck, reeling from his divorce and struggling to connect with his son whilst having to deal with the cold-shoulder treatment from his ex, also finds something deep and meaningful during his time with Lauren. Yes, there is nothing romantic, ethical or legal about how these two spies constantly have their eyes on this woman by spending some hi-tech valuable national resources – but this is McG’s world. It’s not supposed to be taken too seriously. And once you get past the issue regarding invasion of privacy, it turns into an entertaining romp.

With appealing leads, McG sustains the intrigue surrounding his love triangle but where he fails to truly impress is with his action scenes which never find enough momentum. As a subplot, these two CIA agents manage to anger a dangerous mobster. And surprise, Lauren gets caught in the middle of something deadly. What follows is a highly unsatisfying car chase, followed by one anti-climactic shoot-out in which Lauren makes her ultimate decision, all too soon, with a far too convenient solution to give everyone a happy ending. It will make you cringe, but because of its consistent build-up, ultimately it’s an ideal film for a brainless night-out.