Something important and totally worth reading all the way through

Sometimes, there are really busy weeks, and sometimes there are quiet weeks.

Sometimes there are weeks that start of quiet and then get a lot more complicated. Sometimes many weeks are like these.

Sometimes you wish these weeks were over. Sometimes you wish these weeks weren’t the weeks that they were.

Do you understand what I mean?

Do I?

Silliness aside (well mostly), one has to fill a column somehow (and apparently the old 1953 methods just don’t cut it anymore), I’m sure that you’ve experienced many weeks like these, especially now, when many of you are in the middle of, or impatiently waiting for, exams.

This is a strange and confusing term for Felix, since, like you, most of our editors are busy with the stress of exams, the pain of revision and the mental gymnastics required to survive an ordeal in the Sahara simulation that is the 5th floor of the Central Library (well at least for the time being – see page 1 – if you haven’t already, I assume you probably saw it when you picked this issue up, or read it online, or read the entire article wittily condensed by some know-it-all twitterati superstar into a twisted, debauched 140 character version of its former self).

This means that the Editor spends a lot of time trying to work out who will actually be available, what will come in and how much extra they have to do, a situation which leads to weird, slightly transcendental articles like this.

This also, hopefully, explains why our issues are shorter this term, since after all we rely on your contributions and astute observations to fill our lovely papery pages.

Honestly, if we could, we would ban all exams, and not just because it would give you more time to submit articles to our section editors (they get fewer emails – trust me it’s better that way), but also because as a student population, we’ve been continually tested since a very young age, wouldn’t it be nice if we had a break one year, before we actually have to get a job.

However, such is life.

Right, time to put on the opinionated hat. Now I am the cat in the hat, but not with capitals because then that could cause a few legal issues. Remember, it’s descriptive, not titular.

The initialisation of a process that may bring cooling to the Central Library? Good. Great. FANTASTIC!

Eurovison statistics you cry? Engaging, interesting and amusing.

Summer Sun? Fabulous!

Mysterious filming last week? Curious. Unusual. Who was it?

Oh, and just before you go: follow us on snapchat @feliximperial.

Oh, and if you send anything funny, we will screenshot it, and probably publish it :)