Cambridge humiliated by Immortals
HAHAHAHAHAHA WHO"S LAUGHING NOW?
It has been only two weeks since the Immortals fell victim to the Cambridge Pythons. With a lapse of concentration (from a heavily fatigued Defence) the score was 6-0 for Pythons when the bell did toll. The loss was particularly painful due to the honest fact we are the better team, and on that day it was insufficient preparation that ultimately let us down.
The day began cold, made all the worse when Markus ‘Where’s your bus?’ Mohr found out the minibus we had booked was missing. Despite this, we got to the fortress of Harlington ready to defend it against the then undefeated Pythons. We too are undefeated but only at home; needless to say, both team had streaks we wanted to keep. Immortals started strong and maintained momentum for the whole game. Our star quarterback, linebacker, kicker and punter Jason ‘Captain America’ Patrick Kuilan scored four touchdowns on offence, and flew around making massive hits on defence. All his plays earned him the title of overall MVP for the day, although his full value is impossible to express in words or awards alone. As well as scoring on offence we also scored on defence when Henners ‘one of everything’ Turner (Line MVP) slithered through the Pythons O-line, knocking over their Quarterback onto his lard-ass, and recovering the ball in the endzone for a touchdown. His blocking on offence allowed for the devastating ground game to have full effect. Nigvi ‘Beast-mode’ Tam was awarded Offensive MVP, for his consistent plays, great blocks and elusive ‘like a mouse’ style of running. The touchdowns were often followed by Jorge ‘HHHhhhhhimmortals’ Ales (Rookie Offensive MVP) firing into the end zone to secure the two point conversions. On defence we were as consistent as always. With the injured Frankenstein looking ‘Shlidzilla’ Guillaume Fontan battling though to stop any advances from the Pythons. Shout-out to my main-man-triple-OG-Mc Daim ‘Smooth as the chocolate’ Tariq, for curbing the snakes and ensuring the shutout. He was awarded Rookie Defensive MVP.
A total of five touchdowns were scored on Cambridge with four successful conversions. The final score was a massive 46-0. Embarrassing, that is what you get when you try and desecrate Immortal ground #OurRunway.
