Dogging disaster
South Kensington dog walkers were left shocked after visiting the ‘DogSoc x Kinky Club Top Ten Dogging Spots’ published last week. The collaboration project between the two societies aroused a few concerns, notably backlash from animal welfare activists, yet also gained a huge amount of publicity for the societies after a rather “limp, wet” freshers’ fair. To investigate further, NegaFelix interviewed the DogSoc Social Secretary Menry Hilne.
“I am in no way condoning that our societies participate in these activities together. While we both have our respective furry friends, these two things should be kept separate. This list was intended to point out different sensory beauties that both dogs and humans alike can enjoy. It’s all natural, really. It is purely coincidence that both our societies involve the scatological.”
Although there was public outrage, one student passerby, Wowen Ilkinson, told us: “The Border Collies were thoroughly impressed with the sights”.
On another note, Duke Lee, a committee member of the church opposite Imperial on Exhibition Road, informed us that since the list has been published membership to the Hyde Park Chapel has skyrocketed. “I am not concerned about the contents: anything that brings anyone closer to The Book of Mormon is a good thing,” Lee wrote on the church Instagram page. We enquired asking if there was an IC Mormon Society due to the number of Mormons talking to students, and gathered the response “not officially.”
DogSoc x Kinky Club Top Ten Dogging Spots
- h-bar Toilets: starting off with a classic, and a joint love of urine.
- Union Storage Room: highly possible that you could find some toys.
- Queen’s Tower scaffolding: though you may not enjoy heights, this recreates the experience of a hike, so could be added to your Strava account.
- Blackett gender-neutral toilets: no exclusion, gender-affirming.
- White City shuttle: the best part about the White City Campus, since it gets you out.
- Huxley Building: specifically take note of the multi-level tunnels, private yet with great exploration.
- Great Hall main stage: roleplay opportunities high, large open space to throw a ball.
- Church of Latter-Day Saints Hyde Park Chapel: helpful, enthusiastic staff. Advise telling them you are married.
- Roderic Hill Building wind tunnel: fantastic sensory experience. Feels sci-fi, yet natural.
- On Alert’s “knees”: who doesn’t love some climbing? Also works as a comfortable viewing spot bench.
