Horoscope writer replaced after fraud allegations

In a shocking turn of events, it has been revealed that the horoscope writer at Felix has not had the sufficient training to be reading the stars.

Juby Roy, who joined the Felix team last year, included her previous experience on LinkedIn including an online astrology course and “situationships constantly asking [her] exact time and place of birth.” When NegaFelix dived deeper into the legitimacy of the online course, it was revealed to be the Imperial College Physics second-year module Suns Stars and Planets.

Roy’s incentives for the role are now unclear in light of the information that she has no belief in the constellations. The team at NegaFelix got in contact with the ex-Catnip editor.

“It’s quite simple really. It’s all propaganda. It’s brainwashing the student population into becoming sex addicts and alcoholics. It’s an advert for a new drinking partner.”

Felix has been in close communication with the Imperial College Union, and has chosen to redact every horoscope ever published. The Editor-in-Chief, Barnaby Hilton-Royce, wrote in an apologetic editorial that he now sees that the material published has been “unsavoury, offensive, and insolent.”