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England have now managed just two test victories in five winter tours and both of those when the series were lost and Australia and the West Indies had already given up. This appaling record was furthered earlier this week when England failed to win. Unlike most I don’t think that this is an easy tour. Zimbabwe or New Zealand away was always going to be tough, but we should have enough killer instinct to wipe out anyone who slips up.
England’s attack on the first day and in the late stages of New Zealand’s second innings was abysmal. Even Atherton himself admitted it was the worst his side had ever bowled. But shouldn’t he have been more assertive in attacking? Couldn’t he have surrounded the heroic Danny Morrison with at least six fielders when Tuffnell bowled? Surely he should have instructed Mullaly to give the tail end the kind of treatment dished out to us by the West Indies in 1994? Two 90 mph bouncers an over would have softened them sufficiently. And if England’s best couldn’t dispose of ‘the world’s worst test batsman’, then why didn’t he have an over or two himself? At least then he could say he that he had tried everything. Instead after the match he spouted on about the match not being won til the winning runs are struck. Shouldn’t he have explained this to his team rather than soldiering on hoping to knock them over eventually? Captains should make things happen rather than wait for them.
The obvious upshot from England’s failure over the last few seasons is to relieve Atherton of the captaincy and change the squad. Unfortunately unlike football and rugby all of England’s best are already selected. There are no natural replacements for any of the positions, the only candidate for captain with experience would be Stewart and his dips in form make Atherton look consistent.
Sadly, it looks likely that the tests in Wellington and here next summer will follow a similar script with Atherton, like Gooch, not going until the Ashes are lost at home.
Even worse than national humiliation down under is the proposed plan for a two up two down system for promotion to football’s Premiership. Although I never saw the Football League do any favours for Kidderminister, Macclesfield or Stevenage, I do have some sympathy. The best in the First Division are becoming stronger than those at the base of the top flight. Barnsley, Bolton and Sheffield United all play better than the bottom half and would give West Ham, Southampton and Middlesborough a run for their considerable riches. The British system relies on the realisation of aspirations and hopes. Any attempts to stifle this will create a less interesting national game. Any team out of the race will see gates and funds plummet. The teams up there have had a windfall that effectively cuts off all but the clubs managed by geniuses. If the entry is reduced to two a season the best players will stay in reserve teams rather than drop down a division with the prospect of promotion and consequently any side that goes up will do a Swindon, conceding over a hundred goals and getting only a handful of points. The only consolation is that the football league will be able to say no - but will they hold out with the huge financial bribe the big clubs can and no doubt will offer in an attempt to buy security?
