Imperial students make their last ‘Panto’
The director tells us about their very unusual interpretation of a seasonal favourite
Over the last couple of years I have had the pleasure of putting on three little known, but well received, performances of what was codenamed ‘Panto’. In two weeks time we’ll stage the final Panto Show, laying the series to rest once and for all.
“Oh no you won’t!”
Oh yes, I will. Just one more, with no mistakes. We want to go out with a bang!
But, why ‘Panto’? It rolls off the tongue more easily than ‘our-top-secret-show-with-a-top-secret-surprise’, and once made us feel like cool and edgy artistes; subverting this light-hearted entertainment staple for something so cool. And edgy. Anyone who came expecting ex-soap stars in drag and saucy innuendos were disappointed.
All we have, and all we’ve ever had since Panto 1, is an idea for a show that could surprise a media-savvy bunch of students who had seen it all before, and had the YouTube favourites to prove it.
I ignored the fact that we’d only planned half a show. I even ignored the fact that my guys had not paid fees to miss a whole day’s lectures (yes, I went there)
So ambitious! So mysterious! So “embarrassing” was how my trusted friend described our run-through the day before the show. I pretended that it was all part of The Plan™. I ignored the fact that we’d only planned half a show. I even ignored the fact that my guys had not paid fees to miss a whole day’s lectures (yes, I went there) to prepare a show that was borderline retarded.
I was tactically avoiding publicising the event. The fewer people that saw the show, the fewer people who’d have nightmares about me, the crazed, perverted abuser of solidly entertaining evenings.
Around 50 (lost?) people still turned up; enough to successfully lobby for my withdrawal from university, or perhaps, Life itself. This was going to be horrific.
It wasn’t. Despite the odd fumbled line and a completely free-styled ending, the novelty of the show went a long way. People laughed. People gasped (and not in an ‘i-actually-feel-physically-violated-by-this-crappy-show’ way). They even stood up and pulled poses on request. Best of all, the surprises actually surprised.
‘Panto’ quickly became a sort-of franchise. We put on a fundraiser sequel and then, a year after the first, we attempted what was to be our Magnum Opus; a sequel to Slumdog Millionaire with a Panto-twist.
Objectively, it was our best Panto yet. It had a big audience. It had a bizarre dairy-based story arc. It had a guy who interpreted my pre-show advice to “have lots of fun so the audience do too” as “rip open your shirt when you say your first line of the whole play”. It had it all.
But, it wasn’t quite complete. This wasn’t yet The Panto™ that I envisioned all those Pantos ago. A bit more time and we would have nailed it. TV interviews, top-ten lists, the works. Instead we got a heartfelt round of applause, people telling us they loved it and the now-customary feeling of having gotten away with it. But it wasn’t complete.
So I’m back. We’re back. Slumdog Millionaire 2: Jamal Got Broke is back.
It will be one evening in which a small group from the Islamic Society (whoops, forgot that) try and put on a show with few resources but lots of heart and raise money for charity in the process. And honestly, I think you’ll be presently surprised. You have my name, if not: Omar Hafeez-Bore, Director of The Last Panto.
Thursday 28th October 7pm, SAF LT1. £3
