Confessions of a Food Editor

Reviews. I hate writing reviews for places that I’ve eaten ‘on the house’. There’s something about dining for free, and the awkward moment when you don’t call for the bill. Do you just thank the waiter and bid him “Adieu!”? And when the restaurant gets my review in the post, I always wonder whether they admire and put it amongst their other shiny reviews; or do they put your name in the black book if you foulmouthed the taste of their tap water; or do they simply throw it in the trash. The latter does seem far more likely. (Especially when they see the last sentence isn’t even finished with a full stop.)

I’m not a fan of artistic blobs on the plate to emulate fine dining. Just because three meagre drops of red berry jus are served on the side of a melon starter does not make it look or taste any better. It’s still 99p Galia melon.

I am a savoury person. Allow desserts, sugar and sweets. It’s a matter of variety more than anything: think of the wonderful world of cheese, the oh-so-tasty steaks, the freshly baked pastries and breads; pasta, fish ’n’ chips, fried artichokes! Although, saying that, I don’t settle for anything less than a Pierre Hermé macaron. Paul, Ladurée, nada. Making these almond delights at home have always resulted in baking paper studded with sticky, sugar blobs, so I ask, why waste time when I can taste perfection from the artisan of Le Macaron himself. People who think Ladurée is some kind of luxury… man, are you oblivious. (And it’s not two “o”s, but one. If you were a true macaronolic, you would know the difference.)

I can’t cook as well as people would expect. I am a self-confessed foodie, which means I have an affinity to good food. It doesn’t mean I can cook (well). What were restaurants made for, eh?

And yes you hate me because I’m the person that makes you wait until the food goes cold, whilst I take a gazillion photos on my dSLR. And?

And finally, being food editor this year, boy was that hard. Having free meals to distribute, being sent a cookery book here and there, maybe just get a free ticket occasionally. But no, seriously, with students’ meal habits ranging from a baguette from The Sandwich Shop to a meal in Heston Blumenthal’s ‘Dinner’ - the middle ground sure is No Man’s Land. Adieu!