Condomed to obscurity

Condoms have been around for quite a while now, allowing men all around the world to awkwardly fumble and pretend they know what they’re doing. The design has actually been pretty similar for over 50 years. The reason being that latex condoms are cheap and pretty easy to make, use, discard (discretely), and are thin enough for a transferred sensation to occur. A staggering ten billion condoms were used in 2005 (with probably only two million being used by Silvio Berlusconi). It’s predicted that 27 billion condoms will be used in 2015. Suggesting that the population is either growing rapidly, or just becoming a lot hornier. Possibly a combination of both.

Every area has someone that wants to come in and shake things up. No pun intended there. These have taken many forms, from female condoms to some slightly stranger inventions. One guy, Jan Vinzenz Krause, invented a spray on latex condom. The trial didn’t go too well: all of the volunteers didn’t want to take part once they knew whatit would involve. That would be a pretty awkward study to be part of. “So, what, I take a tablet everyday that may be real or a placebo and then track how I am feeling?”. “Erm, not exactly. Take off all your clothes while I get the condom spraying machine”... Ill fated tests aside, this wasn’t ever going to be a winner. The reason being that it took three minutes for the condom to dry. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think it may ruin the mood a bit if you have to stop proceedings and say: “hang on, I’m going to spray latex on my penis and then wait for three minutes for it to dry. Watch out, just incase the latex drips on your bed.”

Recently, as reported in a feature in the New Scientist, two designers have come up with what they think is the next big thing in condom design (oh so many puns there). Danny Resnic and Ray Chavez have decided that making a condom with pleasure as the focus would make men more inclined to use them. They used silicone, not latex, and they ‘fold’ on rather than roll on; this means there are textures and ridges, which they say make it a hybrid condom/sex toy. They’ve also made the chamber where semen is stored a lock that is one way. They have held a trial where volunteers used them by themselves. You read that right. They gave people a condom, a room, and free reign on the internet. That’s another slightly odd and awkward study to be included in and/or conduct. The results were all positive, but given what they were asking them to do, I’m fairly sure that they would say it was okay no matter what. Will this be the future of condoms, or condomed to a mere curiosity?