Arsenal Crowned Premier League Champions

F or years Arsenal have existed somewhere between nostalgia – the glory days of Henry and Berkamp – and parody. They were permanently close enough to matter but never convincing enough to truly believe in, and that had only became more relevant with back to back to back second places. The last few seasons under manager Mikel Arteta have seemed to follow the same pattern: strong start, a collapse, endless arguments about their mentality, then “trust the process.” Now, after more than two decades, they are Premier League champions once more.

And despite how unbearable parts of this is going to become, they probably deserve enormous credit for it. This was no fluke. Arsenal built one of the most structurally complete sides in Europe, albeit not without criticism (PSG will see this to be true). They became disciplined and physically dominant, with an impenetrable rest defence. Previous Arsenal teams were often criticised for being fragile or naïve; this side almost overcorrected in the opposite direction. In the 2022-23 season, Arsenal played free flowing football, with one traumatic loss to City. Arteta switched it up. Now his football can feel less like the beautiful game and more like the beautiful risk management. Matches are most often slowed down, spaces suffocated, and opponents drained. This, for me, in its sterility, has been boring. But titles are not awarded for aesthetic value: they have won the league because they are the hardest team in the league to play. Still, it is difficult to talk about this Arsenal era as some kind of pure football fairytale. There are uncomfortable realities around the club that do not disappear because they are lifting the title. For instance, the controversy surrounding their former commercial relationship with “Visit Rwanda”, in its tokenism, remains a point of tension for many supporters and observers.

Outside of that, honestly, yes, some of this is hating. I am aware of that. But it is also my column, and if Arsenal fans are allowed to spend twenty-one years insisting everyone “respect the process,” then the rest of us are allowed to be irritated when the process finally works.

Because even outside the serious issues, this Arsenal side is just be a bit cringe. There is a self-consciousness around the club that constantly spills onto social media. The dramatic captions, documentary-style speeches, overproduced celebrations, and endless online posting make the whole thing feel strangely performative. Great teams usually project a sense of ease or inevitability. Arsenal often feel like a team desperately aware they are being watched. Sometimes the best thing this squad could do is take a touch, and act like champions without trying to narrate every emotion in real time.

At the same time, several players are genuinely quite likeable individually. Bukayo Saka has handled pressure and abuse with maturity far beyond his years. I have loved Eberechi Eze’s rise to the top, and David Raya is phenomenal. The fans ultimately, deserve their happiness. The actual ones though – those who sat through Mustafi, Thursday nights in Belarus, and yearly April collapses deserve to enjoy this properly. But the last 48 hours online have also produced a tidal wave of poser Arsenal fans who have suddenly rediscovered the club now that there is a trophy attached to it. Half of these people probably last watched Bukayo Saka when he missed the penalty for England, yet are now posting emotional threads about “what this means to the community” like they have been in the Clock End since birth. Arsenal have finally won the league again. The football world will now spend the summer pretending to be normal about it. Nobody will succeed. Let’s hope we win the World Cup to distract us all.