Please sir, where can I find good coffee?

Coffee. Most people have tried it, some are addicted to it and at this time of year it is used by many students to help with revision. The coffee bean is one of the biggest agriculture commodities in the world, while the drink is omnipresent in today’s 24 hour culture. Coffee bars are everywhere, as are vending machines offering a hot, sweet, rich tasting beverage for little more than the loose change most of us carry in our pockets.

The coffee seen most commonly – served in boutique cafes and our own cafes around campus – is brewed through the espresso method. This method forces water vapour through ground coffee beans, producing a concentrated liquid. This is great if you are struggling through an advanced thermodynamics textbook, however, if you are unfortunate enough to find yourself queuing up in the Library Cafe your joy may be short lived.

The art of producing a good cup of coffee is relatively complicated when compared to the task of producing a cup of tea. Questions such as milk first or tea first are irrelevant when making coffee. The beans should be roasted until they are a rich brown colour, then ground to allow the water absorb the flavour. The water must not be boiling so that the beans are not cooked, resulting in the bitter flavour in the espresso. The milk must be heated and frothed using steam but avoid boiling-induced rancification of the milk.

I must stress I did say it was relatively complicated, just as breathing through your mouth is relatively complicated when compared with breathing through the nose. Most places serving coffee today have large machines which are easily adjusted to make sure these problems are avoided. If the water or milk get too hot you can turn down the temperatures or flow rates and avoid the horrible tastes associated with boiling.

A reasonable assumption, in my opinion, is when I am ordering a coffee, or any product for that matter, the person making it will be trained and knowledgeable in that area. Just as when I worked in a bakery while in sixth form, it would have been reasonable for a customer to expect I was trained and had enough knowledge to produce the product they were purchasing.

Yet, again and again, I am left astounded by the inability of staff, particularly in the Library Cafe, to produce a drink to even the standards, in terms of taste or presentation, of a mug of freeze dried instant coffee. I do not expect our campus cafes to produce a drink to the standards of Caffé Espresso, but surely a coffee which is close to the drinkability of a Starbucks coffee is not unattainable. From this I do not want anyone to take that I believe what Starbucks serve is good coffee, however, its taste is not unpleasant relative to the drivel we are expected to endure on campus.

I was inspired to write this by two particularly abhorrent cups of coffee served to me by the Library Cafe. Normally, my drink of choice is a Macchiato and for those who do not have much experience of espresso coffee there are normally about six different basic ways to serve, which are common to most coffee bars:

Espresso: Concentrated shot of coffee; Macchiato: Espresso with a small amount of milk added; Latte: Espresso with steamed milk served with a little or no foam; Americano Espresso topped up with hot water; Mocha: Espresso with chocolate syrup, steamed milk and foam or whipped cream; Cappuccino: Espresso with steamed milk and foam.

The significance of the small amount of milk in my macchiato is that it reduces the bitterness, which has been present in every cup of coffee I have ever purchased on campus. This is the bitterness produced through the cooking of the ground beans at too high a temperature.

The first cup of coffee which I took offence to was served early in the morning. While passing the Library, I took a quick detour in the hopes of finding something which would awaken my mind before the day’s revision. On the surface, the coffee seemed very much what I was hoping for; once I took the first sip it became very clear it was not. The taste was bitter, almost undrinkable.

The second cup underlines what I believe to be the more serious problem present in college catering. On Sunday, I ventured from my department in search of a pick-me-up. The only place nearby was the Library cafe. I ordered my usual Macchiato and when it was presented to me, it was clearly not what I had expected. It was something straddling the border between a small Latte and a Cappuccino. Too much milk and foam to be what I had ordered. Some of you may say “So what?”. You may think I’m being a coffee snob. I just want what I paid for and want it made by someone who knows what they are doing.

When I worked as a baker I did not always enjoy what I was doing, but I always took pride in the products I produced. I was never asked by a customer for a loaf of brown bread and instead gave them six white rolls. Why is College catering unable to take the same opinion when they prepare food and drink for the staff and students here?

Initially this was going to be an article in which I ranted over a cup of coffee. Instead, in the process, it highlighted to me the issues that have resulted in the college population having to suffer sub-standard catering.

In any industry, companies and employees need to take pride in what they are producing for customers. In the small case of my daily coffee, I do not want someone who neither drinks nor has any knowledge of espresso serving me. I am sure this is the case for anyone who has a reasonable expectation of quality in what they pay for.