NegaFelix

Fresher pledges to do everything

“The current editor-in-chief doesn’t know anything about anything."

All slackers in group projects are just one person

Scientists at Edinburgh University have revealed that every single lazy member of a university team that never contributed to your group project are actually the same man. Scottish Researchers in the Experimental Pedagogy Department have tracked down the man who is added to groups to work on a project, before

Business school courses for 21/22 revamped

Every academic year, the Imperial College Business School attracts eager young professionals from all over the world to join a community of students keen to sell their souls to the finance sector.  We recently gained access to an unreleased copy of the Business School’s new list of course offerings.

Exclusive: Lead on church roofs blocks God’s vision

The world Christian community has been rocked by revelations that God hasn’t been able to see or hear anything going on in churches for the last 1700 years due to the lead used in church roofs.  Church leaders have revealed that the lead used to keep off the rain

Horoscopes 21/05

Our Felix exclusive horoscope

Horroscopes 28/05

Your weekly update on the positions of the stars

Women who say they are “not like other girls” are in fact >99.99% similar

Researchers at the University of Yorkshire have found that women who describe themselves as “not like other girls” are unlikely to significantly differ from their peers. Lead researcher, Feb Senton told NegaFelix that while this is a common claim, the science does not hold up the statistical significance of many

10 diseases that humanity really should have gotten around to dealing with already

10 | Malaria This is a disease caused by tiny little worms. The fact that this disease is still causing us such problems is possibly a wakeup call. If humanity can’t beat little worms, then maybe we should just accept the L. Maybe humans just weren’t meant to be

Horoscopes 03/06/2021

Well well well, what do the stars have in store for us this week? ARIES: This week its revealed covid spread so rapidly in china after a typo urged citizens to sneeze the means of production. TAURUS: This week you make a 5 minute hack video baklava out of printer

British sunbathers final defence against climate change

This week climate scientists, were shocked by the readings on their instruments that showed that global temperatures had in fact dropped by 0.1 °C over the weekend. This is equivalent to 500 thousand tons of CO2 being removed from the atmosphere.  This effect was found to be the result

MI6 refuses to reveal source as they are scared of pronouncing name wrong

JAMES, AN MI6 INSIDER, WHO KEPT HIS SURNAME A SECRET TO AVOID BEING IDENTIFIED The court case against an international crime boss has been setback by the refusal of MI6 officers to cooperate with the court case.  Following years of investigations costing hundreds of thousands of pounds, mafia boss Jag

Williamson launches free speech crusade

Gavin Williamson bravely stops the cultural Marxists from no-platforming speakers by no-platforming them