(In Imperial Confessional form)
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Mr Felix Felix,
I love you.
Your French face,
your supple cheeks,
turn my heart savage,
turns me into a freak.
Notice me Senpai,
I need you so,
Make me wear the cat mask,
and turn me into your hoe.
- Anonymous
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Both the Departments of Mathematics and Physics will be burning sage in what insiders say is a “desperate” attempt to combat worsening student satisfaction. The use of sage burning, a practise derived from withcraft, is seen to be a radical departure from both departments’ lack of action. “Look, we don’
An Imperial student was revealed to be saving thousands of pounds each year by eating the presentation dishes at campus eateries. Taste Imperial outlets usually prepare an extra meal for display to let students know what sauce accompanies the specific rice-and-meat preparation they serve on that day. These
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UK Chancellor John Healy, appointed by Andy Burhnam earlier this year, delivered his first Budget speech to the Commons on Wednesday 28 October, where he announced graduates from UK universities with “strong labour market outcomes” will be allowed to obtain a graduate visa valid for two years. The Labour Government